Doesn't anyone say thank you any more?

  Kate B 01:30 20 May 2005

Call me an old grump (go on, I dare you) but I do find it irritating, to say the least, when you answer a question and the postee either just ticks the box without so much as a "cheers, I'll give it a whirl" or "thanks" or even "you moron, that doesn't work", or even just vanishes, never to be seen again.

I refer particularly to this thread click here? but it's happened to us all many times.

It's partly a grumble about the lack of courtesy, but equally it would be nice to know how they got on.

Or am I just too grumpy for my own good?

  DrScott 04:23 20 May 2005

Still I'm inclined to agree... but then again, in medicine thanks is rarely forthcoming, so I'm pretty used to it. I try to always make sure I thank people if they've helped me!

  DrScott 04:28 20 May 2005

Still I'm inclined to agree... but then again, in medicine thanks is rarely forthcoming, so I'm pretty used to it. I try to always make sure I thank people if they've helped me!

  Forum Editor 07:02 20 May 2005

Over the years your complaint has cropped up hundreds of times. Human nature being what it is some people don't feel it necessary to say thank you, or they simply forget.

We're here to provide help and advice, and I suppose we wouldn't do it if we were relying on thanks. It would be great if everyone made the gesture but it isn't going to happen.

  mec13 07:31 20 May 2005

As my knowledge of computering is very basic, I rely on all of you knowledgable 'persons'(sex discrimination act)for guidance and advice needed. Many times my problems have been solved after advice given by persons like yourself KateB. Although I must say, some advice sometimes given does seems a bit dubious at times, but it has to work both ways obviously. I will continue to come here and seek guidance when my obstinate, over-complicated, machine, misbehaves. So THANKS to all of you who offer this free advice, dont be put of by some people who dont know how to say thankyou, there are many more 'lesser mortals' who need you for the sake of our sanity or even suicidale ideas. Thanks!

  dilly1 07:56 20 May 2005

Just wanted to say thanks to Keithlik for his advice on deleting the nervous-making e-mails that had been arriving in my inbox. Cheers and thank you.

  Brian-336451 08:46 20 May 2005

My wife is cuttingly succinct about this (her being a psychotherapist and all) and says this:

If you are not willing to help and accept you have then don't do it. The 'thanks' bit is an interaction with someone you don't know and says as much about YOU as it does about this person you don't know and who, in reality, doesn't affect your life.

If the people you love and care about don't say 'thanks' then you have an issue.

Whilst to me, I go 'OUCH' I have got to agree with her.

My view tends to be the opposite of yours. I am gratified and pleasantly surprised by the number of people that DO say 'thanks'.

I love the feedback, but then I grew up thinking it was really important to have 'other' peoples' regard - it isn't (much).

If I can help (because I've learned by screwing it up usually) then I do. If I can't I step back, watch and learn.

But 'thank you' costs nothing and goes a long, long way. Your viewpoint is one I've had to manage and by turning it on its head, my personal life has improved.

No, you're not grumpy, you're human and it's a fair observation of the human condition.

  Arthur Scrimshaw 09:45 20 May 2005

Very well put.

  bosmere 09:55 20 May 2005

Kate B my sympathies, but for me more than the 'thanks' are the lack of:

(a) response as to whether the advice worked or not, and

(b) the lack of a green tick.

On page 1 of My Postings there are exactly 50% of the threads that I (and many others) have contributed to that are ticked.

Unfortunately some people are quick to call for help, but slow to show courtesy.

  PurplePenny 10:09 20 May 2005

Over on web design we seem to have quite a high "thank you" rate. I suppose that, in part, it may be due to the fact that people have something visible to show for the help they've received so they often post with a "Thanks, take a look at it now.".

Like DrScott I work in a field (university library) where we are giving help and advice all the time but don't always get (and don't expect to get) thanked. We do like to know whether our advice was correct and will often ask a reader if we see her/him again. At that point there is usually a "thank you" appended to the reply but that isn't why we ask.

  octal 10:20 20 May 2005

One of the quirks of the forum is that if you tick the resolved box and post a reply at the same time, only the thread gets ticked, the post doesn't appear. It's a two click job, either post the thank you then go back and tick the resolved box, or vicky verky, which ever is your want. So maybe you can't always blame the postee if they are not used to the forum.

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