<<< i can't get into msconfig to see what is starting up. >>>
You should be able to. Hold down the "Windows" key and press "R" to open the Run box, type MSCONFIG and press Enter.
As connecting to a router shouldn't involve the installation of any software - it's a network device that you connect to - the new Modem/Router shouldn't be the source of the problems.
Have you tried booting the "Last Known Good Configuration" or running System Restore?