but I'm sure your tongue is firmly in your cheek.
It would have to be - you can't seriously be suggesting that TV adverts should include such a statement. The term 'heavy user' isn't a vague slur unless you take it as such - it simply means that you are a heavy bandwidth consumer.
There's too much emotive talk about bandwidth quotas (I take it that's what you're referring to), and it muddies the water. All that's happened is that a broadband service provider has decided to stop a tiny percentage of users from consuming a disproportionately large chunk of bandwidth. Those of us who will be unaffected - and that means the vast majority - don't have a thing to get het up about do we?
Unless we perceive the signs of some dire and sinister plot that is - which I don't.