I went to a well known pet shop at the weekend in order to purchase some fish for my sons tropical fish tank.
I found an assistant, a young lad of about sixteen, and pointed to the tank full of Neon Tetras and said that I wanted six of those and one Zebra Danio please (the one Danio was to replace one that had recently passed away). “No problem” he said, and dragged his ladder over to the display tank and within about five minutes he had managed to catch six Neon Tetras. About 15 minutes later I noticed that he was quite flustered and still poking his net in the tank trying to catch a Danio. “I can’t get the last one” he said, “It’s too fast and the tanks too big”. It was then that I pointed out to him that the tank next to the one he was trying to catch the fish in was full of Danios and I would happily take one of those. So he dragged his ladder over to the next tank and instantly netted a fish.
He sealed the bag full of fish and wrote out my receipt. “These come with a full replacement guarantee” he said “If one dies within a week then bring it back and we’ll replace it”. “Bring it back?” I said “What a dead fish?” “ Yeah we’ll replace it, no questions asked” he replied.
On leaving the store I couldn’t help thinking of Monty Python and that parrot.
Places that flog fish around here operate the same policy...if it snuffs it within 7 days they will cough up your readies. With some of the Koi selling like hot cakes at over £1500 each, I would strap the ruddy, lifeless thing to my head and wear a tutu if it snuffed it and I had do this to claim my money back.