Does This Ring Any Bells?

  IZZY 14:38 28 Feb 2003

At a recent computer expo Bill Gates, comparing the computer industry with the auto industry, said: ‘If General Motors had kept up with the technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1000 miles to the gallon.’

General Motors issued this response: ‘If we had developed technology akin to Microsoft we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics.

For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day. Every time they repainted the lines on the road, you’d have to buy a new car.

Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all the windows, shut off the car, restart it and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason, you would simply accept this.

Occasionally, executing a manoeuvre such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to start, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five time as fast and twice as easy to drive – but would run on only five per cent of the roads.

The oil, water temperature and alternator warning lights would all be replaced with a single “This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation” warning light.

The airbag system would ask “Are You Sure?” before deploying.

Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

Every time a new car was introduced, car buyers would have to learn to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

You’d have press the Start button to turn the engine off.”

I thought this was quite amusing with a great deal of truth in it. Hope you like it.

Kind Regards,


  Goldcroft 14:40 28 Feb 2003

Yup. The same bell was on the forum in the last couple of weeks. But it's good and bears repetition.

  IZZY 14:50 28 Feb 2003


Thanks for that. Must have overlooked the previous posting. Just proves there is nothing that gets past this Forum. Will mark as resolved and, hopefully, others will not be bothered with it.

Rgards to all,


  Les 13:16 01 Mar 2003

It gave me a good laugh - a very witty reply to Bill Gates!!

  Stuartli 13:49 01 Mar 2003

It was also reproduced in full in the Daily Mail's Answers to Correspondents column a few days ago.

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