It was billed as the duel of the century (even if it's only 2007), but the eCelebrity Death Match between Apple CEO Steve Jobs and Microsoft pensioner Bill Gates turned out to be a softy love-in.

Both men - ferocious tigers in their industry - turned into pussy cats, and licked milk from each other's bowls. Slurp!

Steve may as well have installed Vista on his iPhone. Bill could have clipped on an iPod shuffle.

Next time let's have a proper bust up. Woz vs Ballmer, please. Mudbath filled. Gloves off. Ding ding!